Dear Naria, you made it

 Wow. It’s been years. Six of them. The girl who started this blog had no clue what the future had in store. 

We got pregnant in November 2015. 

We lost that baby January 2016. 

We got pregnant May 2016. 

We lost our twins late June 2016. 

We got pregnant in August 2016. 

We lost our son Samuel in October 2016. 

We knew something had to change 

We received our donor embryos November 2016, and got pregnant December 2016. 

We lost that donor baby January 2017. 

We got pregnant February 2017

And stayed pregnant 

It was a miserable pregnancy with hyperemesis 

but we stayed pregnant. 

And welcomed our son October 19, 2017. He was everything the girl who started this blog could have ever dreamed of. 

May 2019 we decided to try again. It didn’t work. Our first failed cycle in years. 

But we tried again in July 2019. 

We got pregnant. 

My husband was diagnosed with cancer in August. He kicked cancer’s ass. He’s still cancer free. 

We stayed pregnant. Sick as hell again, but pregnant. 

And on April 2, 2020, in the midst of a global pandemic, we welcomed our precious and perfect daughter. 

Some days I’m still not sure if our family is complete. We still have three embryos on ice. 

But kiddo, we made it. Not on the timeline we hoped for. Not in the ways we expected. But we made it. 

A long time coming (not a BFP)

So,

This blog post has been a long time coming. I think that now the exodus is complete, and we can resume my regularly scheduled rantings.

Although, I may be starting a new blog, or setting this one to password access.

Because a funny thing has happened.

A funny thing that I could have never imagined on January 13th, 2015.


Since the Exodus from the dump, that little proboards forum site has grown to nearly 7800 members, with an average of 300,000 page views a day.

And I'm doing the craziest thing of my life.

You see, 8 or 9 months ago, several of the moderators formed a facebook group so that we could speak candidly about some of the shenanigans going on at the other place. The writing was on the wall for a LONG ASS TIME before the bannings started. And jokingly (or half-jokingly) several of us said "we're smart, we should make a run at making a better website.

Never in my wildest dreams did I think that less than 8 months after that conversation that I would be the one driving the crazy train, straight on to new-website ville.

When I launched the proboards forums, I had zero intention of making this a business venture. I just wanted a safe place for my friends.

But as people defected from the other site, we kept hearing the stragglers say "I want to come, but I don't want to leave people behind. I want people to be able to find us. I want to provide the support that I have been given."

And so the wheels started turning. And with the help of two other early defectors, we're making a run at it. This isn't news for 90% of the people reading this blog. But for that other 10% that didn't follow us over, or who weren't part of the other place, this is big. Like really big.


I would like to introduce you to Then Comes Family. Our goal is to be the #1 fact based TTC, Pregnancy, and Family website on the internet, inclusive of all families in all shapes and sizes, no matter what that looks like.


So if you haven't already, come join us at www.thencomesfamily.com/community

It's still in the earliest of early stages, but I am beyond excited to see what comes next.

Ban Hammer

SO for those of you who are here from TB, I'm sure you've noticed I was banned. When I have the energy I'll probably write up the long version of the story.


The short version is that I challenged BM one too many times, and she cleaned house and banned me. This was AFTER I had a phone call with the COO/co-founder of TB and we were promised more transparency as mods.

My email is nariadreaming@gmail.com

Shoot me an email, tell me who you are. I may even be game at this point for adding some of you amazing ladies on FB.


Otherwise you can feel free to join us on www.bumpbitches.com (goodbyecb.proboards.com if you need a work safe link)


See you on the flip side!

Trying to trust my RE- but it's hard

So my ovaries still just chugging along here. After talking with my RE he thinks we may be ready to trigger Saturday/Sunday for a retrieval early next week!

Right ovary had 13 in the 8-9mm range, left ovary had 20+ in the same range. I know there are women who would kill to have this "problem" but I'm just terrified we're going to get cancelled again.

The RE's decided that we're adding in the ganirelix starting tomorrow to hopefully keep things from running away from us again. 

We also had a long conversation about why the clinic prefers a 2DT over anything else and I'm much more comfortable with it. My RE and his embryologist have gone back and forth on this multiple times. The embryologist tends to follow recommendations and research coming out of Europe, as well as her experience in the field, which has led her to preferring 2DT over any other transfer. 

Since my RE is using time lapse now, the embryologist has said the data she gets from the embryo on day 2 is almost the same as the data she gets from the embryo on day 3, and she feels that the best place for the embryo at that point is in the uterus based on the majority of the genetic imprinting research that she has reviewed. 

So we're back to just waiting. I'm exhausted- I always get this way on the stims... but it's driving me nuts. Coupled with the fact that I've tried to drastically reduce my caffeine consumption and it's a recipe for one cranky Naria. 

Here we go again

Sorry for the radio silence around the holidays. It was a busy one filled with kids, joy, laughter, and professional development.

And as soon as I got home from it all, AF showed up and I was launched head-first into our next IVF cycle. ..

The plan is 100 IU of follistim and 75 of menopur for as long as it takes....


We did an estrogen priming protocol since I don't tolerate provera alone, and the birth control over-suppressed me. It wasn't too bad, all things considered.


I'm currently on Day 5 of stims and aside from the hot flashes and some nausea I'm doing ok. No major bloating yet, but I know that's coming soon. My E2's were only at 92 on Day 4 with my largest follie being 8.5.

The nausea is the most obnoxious part. I'm down 2.5 pounds from when we started stimming because I just can't keep anything down. Yesterday I had 1/4 of a chicken breast and 3 bites of potato salad. It' obnoxious and I pray it's not a preview of what pregnancy will be like for me.

I figure we've probably got another 8-10 days of stims so I'm settling in for the long ride.

Not much going on

We've started our estrogen priming for our upcoming IVF cycle.

Estrace 2 pills daily up through Christmas, and then adding in Provera at night alongside the estrace until New Years.

Then we wait for AF and start stimming.


We're taking things low and slow this time, and they've told me to be prepared for 16 or so days of stimming so that we don't lose control of my follies again.


Not much to update. It's just a holding pattern right now

Escape from Santa's Secret Sweatshop

I swear I'm still here and I'm still alive everyone! I've just been crazy busy with work (it's our busy season) and with some of the community organizations I'm involved in (it's their busy season as well).

And of course, to top it all off, I've been trapped in Santa's Secret Sweatshop damn near every moment I'm not at work or doing stuff for my organizations.

Chances are, if you're reading this blog you'll know two things

1) Infertility is freaking expensive
2) I have several pinterest boards dedicated to crafting things for my loved ones.

So since I have a distinct lack of money right now (#1) and tons of inspiration (#2) it's going to be a crafty Christmas up in the Dreaming household. I've been working on gifts for a few months now, but I needed something quick and easy for hostesses gifts for the million parties I'm going to, and for my coworkers.

Enter the SUGAR SCRUB. It was quick, it was easy, and I must say it is FANTASTIC. And cheap. Especially if you have access to used jars. I used ball jars for mine, but I've seen people upcycle the cute little starbucks frappuccino bottles and it's adorable.

The best thing about the sugar scrub- you can make it in bulk (see the very end of the post) and it ended up costing me roughly $2 per container when all was said and done. That sure as hell beats $8+ each for EXACTLY THE SAME THING from Bath and Body Works.

So without further ado (and I apologize for the messy pic)

Candy Cane Sugar Scrub

Ingredients- will make three pint jars each

6 cups granulated sugar
2/3 cup coconut oil
Peppermint essential oil
Red food coloring


You'll want to use two mixing bowls- I used glass for easy clean up with the oil. Divide the sugar between the two mixing bowls.

Heat up your coconut oil- I microwaved mine in short bursts until it was liquid. While the coconut oil is heating, add 2 drops of red food coloring and 2 dropper fulls of peppermint essential oil (adjust per your preference) to the measuring cup. Once the coconut oil is melted, measure out 1/3 cup into the measuring cup with the peppermint EO and food coloring. Use a fork to mix.

Add the oil mix to one of the bowls of sugar, mixing until it has a soft consistency. You may need to add more sugar to get your desired texture. Play around with it. It's not rocket science.

Repeat the above steps with a second 1/3 cup of coconut oil, omitting the food coloring and mix with the second bowl of sugar.

Now, you'll need to fashion a wide-mouth funnel out of something. I used a coffee filter that is pointed at the bottom. I cut the point off about 1" up from the bottom. A standard household funnel will not work, as the sugar-oil mixture is too thick to pass through.

Now, begin layering the two colors of sugar scrub into the containers, tapping the container on the counter to even it out (or not, if you're going for that sand sculpture look). I did 1/2 cup at a time for mine, so 4 layers each.

Once the containers are full, put the top back on, add a printable label and dress it up with ribbons and scrapbook paper. Clearly I haven't gotten to that point yet. This elf is on her union break.

To use: 
Once a week (or more if necessary) use a spoon to scoop out a heaping tablespoon, and apply to dry skin. Massage in circles for a few minutes before your shower or bath. Rinse remainder off in the bath. Do be careful- since there's oil, you'll be quite slick.

To note: 

Because there is oil in this, you do run the risk of it going rancid. Instruct the recipients to only use a clean spoon (NOT HANDS) to scoop out the sugar, and suggest that they do NOT keep it in the tub- water getting into the mix is the number one cause of sugar scrub going rancid. If they follow these instructions and keep a good air-tight seal on it, it should last 2-3 months.

If you want to further protect your sugar scrub from going bad early, I would suggest adding some Vitamin E oil (you can just buy vitamin e capsules and split them open) and sea salt to the mix. I haven't done this myself, but based on recipes I see online I would suggest 1 tablespoon of vitamin e oil per 1/3 cup of coconut oil. I'm not sure on the measurement for the sea salt (I'd have to do more research).

I've also seen suggestions to add Tea Tree oil. Not only is it great for acne-prone skin, but it also has antimicrobial properties. If you go this route, reduce the amount of scented essential oils you add, and substitute in 10 drops per 1/3 cup coconut oil.

If you're REALLY afraid of germs, you can also add Liquid Germall Plus- it's what people who craft for a living use to preserve their scrubs. I have NO clue how much you would add. So do your research.

Make it in bulk and save

As promised, here is the shopping list if you would like to make it in bulk. You WILL have some raw material left over (especially the coconut oil, but that's never a bad thing in my house). I made 24 jars, and it took less than 1 hour total.

20lb sugar. $8.50 at Target
Nature's Way Coconut Oil 32oz Container- $17.24 on Amazon. I only used 2/3 of the jar.
Essential Oil- .5oz container. I got mine at Michaels with a 40% off coupon for $2.68 after discount
Food coloring- $1
Ball Jars- 2 dozen. I paid $17.46 after tax with my Red Card discount.

Total cost- $46.68

So even if you don't take into account the savings of overage with the sugar and coconut oil, you're looking at cost per gift of $1.95. Maybe $2.50-$2.75 if you add preservatives and buy a bunch of expensive ribbons to dress it up. If you use upcycled jars, the cost drops to $1.22 each