Miles apart

And now for something not TTC related.


I'm currently living 600 miles from my best friend. The type of best friend who you can't imagine living without. The type that would take a bullet for you. The type that you're so in tune with that they don't even have to speak- you're always on the same wavelength.

And my friend is going through some major life struggles. Divorce, job changes, moving (even further away) and some other stress that comes to living in a new city. Said friend is not in a good head space mentally.

I've not been able to sleep for the past two nights. I've woken up thinking about them several times each night and it's tearing me apart from the inside knowing that I can't just show up and hug them to make it better.

I'd give anything to be able to hop on a plane tonight and show up at their doorstep. I know there's more going on than they're telling me through skype/facebook/text... and it's killing me not knowing how I can support them through this time.

I'm thinking there's going to be a weekend roadtrip in my future.

Life Hack Sunday- no drip ice pack

There is nothing in the world that I hate more than a drippy, wet bag of melting ice cubes when I'm trying to ice something down or keep something cool.


This LHS is quick and easy

What's in your Oven Friday: Chicken Divan (Chicken Divine!)

When I think of comfort food from home, I think of my mommy's chicken divan. It's more or less the opposite of healthy, but good golly it's quick, easy, and it freezes well!

Mom's Chicken Divan

Ingredient List

2 packages (10oz each) frozen broccoli

4 cups cubed chicken (I tend to use pre-cooked tyson chicken- you could pre-cook and cube your own though)
2 10oz cans Cream of Chicken soup
3/4 cup mayo
1 tsp lemon juice
1 cup shredded cheese

To Prepare:
Preheat oven to 350*

Cook broccoli according to package directions and drain

Grease a 9x13 baking dish (I prefer to use butter to add to the deliciousness)

Mix chicken and broccoli together, and add to 9x13 baking dish. Combine cream of chicken soup, mayo, and lemon juice, and pour over chicken and broccoli mixture. Top with cheese

Cook in oven for 35-40 minutes

Insert into face and enjoy the cheesy goodness!

An Ode to Iced Coffee

DIY iced coffee is my new BFF. I've been trying to cut down on caffeine for the good majority of this TTC journey. But with taking on a new role, I'm burning the candle at both ends and in the middle.

Enter iced coffee. Since my cup is probably 3/4 ice and 1/4 coffee, I've realized I can have 3 cups of iced coffee for the same amount of caffeine as 1 cup of hot coffee.

It's the same amount of coffee, but if I try hard, I can trick myself into thinking "ok, you've had 3 cups of coffee today- you're invincible. And at the end of the day, I feel human: 

DIY Wednesday- The easiest dry erase board ever

I'm a sucker for cheap, easy, and fun gifts. My little sister started college this year, and I saw this on pinterest and immediately knew I needed to make one for her

Photo Credit: Lisa Cutler

I feel like my DIY projects keep getting easier and easier. I picked up an 8x10 photo frame at the dollar store, inserted a piece of scrapbook paper behind the glass, and then hot glued a string to the back with a loop for a dry erase marker.

Wham, bam, thank you ma'am! Gift DONE.

I'm mailing it to her for her mid-term exam week along with a few starbucks gift cards and some junky snacks.

Getting back on the running train

So I've decided that I absolutely refuse to wait any longer to "be healthy"

And nothing says motivation quite like money on the line.


So today I registered for a 1/2 marathon in May. With a very generous (15 min/mile) pacing cutoff.

7 months to train for a 1/2 should be plenty of time to ease into it and not piss off my RE.

So here goes nothing

The bench

Enough said. My comfy spot for the next month at the very minimum.

No response to the drugs, we're out this month, and taking a month off to relax, get healthy, and focus on us. 

Life Hack Sunday- Don't end up in the ER!

So let's start off with a funny story. A few years ago DH and I were on our way to pick up our new bedding set, but the furniture tiedowns were in a blister pack. I don't know why they felt the need to hermetically seal a $5 pack of tiedowns, but I digress.

So DH was standing in the parking lot with a boxcutter, trying to open the package. He didn't realize that he was standing on black ice. Slip went the foot, slice went the knife, goodbye went the tendon in his left thumb.


I've never seen so much blood in my life.

Luckily the orthopedic surgeon was able to fish the tendon out of his wrist and sew it back together (yeah, it was as disgusting as it sounds) and he's better now. But that was a $4,000 surgery (thank God it happened the month after he got health insurance!) that we really didn't need.


So in Mr. Dreaming's honor, I present to you LHS: Don't cut yourself

Living while Waiting (or waiting while living!)

This is a topic that seems to come up often in the IF community: the waiting. You've got the 2WW after ovulation to test. You've got the wait at the end of the 2WW for AF to show up if you're irregular. You've got the wait after your CD3 ultrasound until your mid-cycle scan.

It's a lot of waiting.

And lately I've found myself wishing that time away. And then I paused to think. If I live to be 85, that means I only have approximately 21,000 days left on earth. Why would I wish ANY of those precious days away. Yes, the waiting sucks, but I need to KEEP LIVING while waiting.

Which is why I've taken up writing again. And singing. And working out when I'm able. And going out with friends. And enjoying a drink or two.


No more wishing time away. Today is the day I start living for the present- because it is truly a gift

What's in your Oven Friday: Lemon Pepper Chicken

I grew up on greek food. I have a love for any sort of lemon chicken. When I found this recipe, I knew I had to try it, and it absolutely did not disappoint!

Recipe and Photo credit: The Recipe Critic

Ingredient List: 

4 boneless skinless chicken breast 

1/4 cup flower

1 tsp pepper

1/4 cup butter

1 package Italian seasoning mix (dry) 

1/4 cup butter

1/2 cup lemon juice

1/2 cup chicken broth

Salt

Pepper

To Prepare: 

Combine flour, salt and pepper (to taste) in a shallow dish. Bread the chicken in the flour mixture. 

Melt butter in sauce pan, and brown chicken without cooking through. You just want the breading to be a nice golden brown. 

Spray crock with cooking spray and add chicken. Sprinkle seasoning on top

Mix together lemon juice and broth. Add to crock pot.

Cook on low for 3-4 hours and enjoy!

If my ovary had a face, I'd punch it

Really? REALLY? Damn you lazy ovaries.

CD 12 u/s was this morning

Left ovary= 20 follies <8 mm
Right ovary 9 follies <8 mm

Which means unless my left ovary pulls a hail mary this weekend, we're officially out this cycle.


And since we're traveling in November, we're benching ourselves, and taking a month to get healthier again.

Onto Injects+ IUI in December.

Sigh.

Goodbye money!

Struggling to find healthy snacks

As I mentioned on Sunday, life has been crazy busy. Which means I'm not finding the time to shop for healthy(ish) snacks to keep in the office, and I don't have time to run out most days to get a healthy lunch.

Which means my office food comes from this

Which is a problem for several reasons

1) It's not healthy

2) The options are limited
3) It's expensive as hell ($1/bag of chips, HELLO!)

So I've been contemplating buying a subscription snack box, and or getting some sort of meal replacement shake (leaning toward a whey protein base) and bullet blender to keep in the office.


Has anyone done a subscription snack box? Was it worth it? Did you like it? I'd love your thoughts! 

DIY Wednesday: Rice Packs

Photo Credit: Blissfully Content

These have been a game changer for me! From AF cramps to injuries, to just needing something warm in my pockets on a chilly day, these easy to make and easy to heat packs are just what the doctor ordered.

Bonus- you can store them in the freezer to keep their scent stronger for longer, and they hold cold as well as heat, so you can use them as cold packs too!

These are seriously easy, you can make them in a variety of sizes, and you almost always can find scrap fabric that will work well. You just want a fabric that breathes well (like cotton, flannel, or a poly blend)

To make, cut two pieces of matching or coordinating fabric. Sew with right sides together, and then turn right-side out. Fill the bags with rice mixed with a spoonful of dried lavender (or other aromatic), turn the edges in, and then sew the last edge shut.

If you have a serger, you can sew the bags right-side out, leave a small opening to fill the packs, and then finish the small opening.

God will bless you when the time is right

Really? My baby sister (who is in college) sent me a message today that said "Don't be discouraged. You need to stop focusing on your infertility and live life. God will bless you in HIS time, and HIS timing is always right".


Because clearly God only blesses women with pregnancy when the time is right. That's why there are no teenage pregnancies, no more abortions in the US, and there are no kids in the foster care system. And of course these families are all totally and 100% prepared for the impact of a child on their life, which is why WIC and SNAP no longer exist, nobody is receiving welfare, and there is no subsidized housing.


I know she's just a kid, but that level of stupidity hurt me today.

Bringing Sexy Back (mildly NSFW)

I think we can all agree that IF can do a number on your self esteem. I feel unattractive, and sex has become rather mundane.


So when Lane Bryant (read: lingerie store for fat ladies) had a massive sale last week, I may have gone a bit overboard.

As in I bought 8 new bras and 30 pairs of panties. Best use of $180 in a long, LONG time. Because it has, indeed, brought sexy back!

And here are a few of the lovely lacy things I bought (on the models who look a hell of a lot better than I do in them!) 

 

Let's just say that DH approves :) I'm finally feeling HOT again!

Holy BLOAT

I feel like a beached whale. Or at least an obese cat stuck on a counter

This water weight gain has been absolutely ridiculous. I've gained 10+ pounds this cycle despite eating well, limiting sodium, etc. 

This shit is my new BFF

Because honestly, I look like I have a pony keg under my skin. I've never had bloating like this, and it's absolutely destroying me. So here's hoping I see a decrease in the weight over the upcoming week.

I'm trying not to freak out because I know it's literally impossible that I have consumed an extra 35,000 calories in the past 8 days. But it's hard. This shit fucks with you.

Life Hack Sunday: The Tangle of Cords

This is how I feel when I look at my work office, home office, and entertainment centers

We've done cord zippers, masking tape labels... but nothing really worked for us to organize the chaos.

Until I saw this beauty on Pinterest

You can clip like cord together, you can label them, they don't leave behind a sticky residue, and they're FREE! 

Just your garden variety exhaustion

I feel like a neglectful blogger. I've been exhausted, plain and simple.

I've been job hunting for awhile, but was offered a lucrative internal promotion. The program that I have been working with (providing life skills education, nutritional counseling, and job interviewing training) is expanding, and several agencies across the US have been interested in learning more about the model. Since I am the most senior member of my service unit I had been doing one-off trainings. But as interest increased, they realized they needed a full time staff trainer on this model.

And I got the promotion!

While I'm going to miss working in direct services, I take great joy in teaching others, and some of my most exciting weeks in the past year have been the ones I was out training.


It means that I'm going to have more downtime in the office after the first of the year as I transition into more training, federal grant writing (Lord help me, I have no clue what I'm doing) and follow up support, but in the meantime I'm crazy busy. I am closing out my current client case files, and training on top of it. It's meant I'm not online as much as I used to be.


I also forgot how exhausted the Femara makes a person feel. I come home from work and go to bed. My weekends revolve around sleeping. It's just generally the pits.


So that's what's new in my world. I'm on CD 7 and not so patiently waiting for our midcycle scan.

What's in your Oven Friday: Beef Barley Stew

Nothing says "Welcome Fall" quite like a hot bowl of soup or stew. I love this recipe (adapted from Happy Money Saver) because you literally can't screw it up. 

Beef Barley Stew

Ingredients: 

1 pound stew meat- diced

1 1/2 cup sliced carrots

1 1/4 cup diced onion 

1 cup chopped celery

5 cups water

1 tsp parsley flakes (or you can substitute fresh) 

1/4 tsp pepper

2 tbsp beef bouillon powder

1/2 cup pearl barley 

15 oz can of tomato sauce 

To prepare:

Throw it all in the crock pot, stir it up, and cook 8-10 hours on low, or 4-5 hours on high

If you want to freeze to make ahead, omit the carrots and water, bag the rest of the ingredients, and then add carrots and water day of. 

 

DIY Wednesday: Coffee/Cocoa Spoons

This is one of my go-to hostess gifts during the holiday season. I've been doing these for YEARS and honestly they're AMAZING.

Sorry for the lack of my own pics (once again). I really need to get better at snapping them as I go along.

Photo Credit: Wayward Girls Crafts

This is another one of those "so simple it's stupid" DIY projects.


Step 1: Melt chocolate in the microwave. You can use confectioners' chocolate from the craft stores, but I normally just use chocolate chips from the baking aisle.

Step 2: Dip spoon in chocolate a few times to get a nice thick layer. Then fill spoon up almost full with chocolate

Step 3: Lay spoon on cookie sheet covered in wax paper

Step 4: Add toppings (I love crushed peppermints)

Let chocolate cool and harden over night. You can then wrap them individually with saran wrap and a curled ribbon, or make a bouquet and put them in a coffee mug to take along as a gift. 

Life Hack Sunday: T-Shirt Time

My college roommate experience sucked. I tended to end up with crazy bitches who more or less went postal half way through the school year.

This, however, was the one gem that roomie #2 left me with, and it's changed the way I fold laundry

LHS: How to fit 500 t-shirts in one dresser

I'm a t-shirt whore. At any given time I have between 150 and 200, and my husband is just as bad. Luckily we can fit our entire t-shirt collection in a standard 6 drawer dresser. Before we had probably 8 tote bins of tshirts that we rotated in and out of our room. 

I think a future LHS will be our t-shirt quilts though.... because there is such a thing as too many t-shrits! 

Need a vacation from the vacation- and this cycle's a bust!

I feel like a neglectful blogger. No meaningful updates in two weeks!


Well, today my suspicions were confirmed. AF reared her ugly fucking head. I'm not as crushed as I thought I would be (this rum & coke is probably helping!) but I'd be a liar if I said it didn't hurt a bit.

But I'm looking forward to the small victories. I ovulated this month, which means my body can do it! We found a med that works, and doesn't make me crazy.

I also found my sex drive. For the first time in 9 months, DH and I have had sex for fun. A lot of sex for fun, actually.

So much sex for fun that my mother walked in on us while we were on the cruise ship. Talk about making you feel like a 17 year old again!

So here I am, looking ahead to our next full cycle!

What's in your Oven Friday: Honey Garlic Chicken

This is one of those recipes that I make in bulk and freeze for my crock pot. If I'm doing a big chicken day, I always make 2 or 3 bags of this.  It's just sweet and sticky enough to really stick to your bones!

I adapted this recipe from Saving You Dinero 

Photo Credit: Saving You Dinero 

Ingredient list
2 pounds boneless skinless chicken breast (or any other chicken you'd like!)
3 cloves garlic- minced
1/3 cup soy sauce
2/3 cup ketchup
1/4 cup honey
1 tsp brown sugar

To Prepare
Put all ingredients + chicken in zip lock bag. Label and freeze

To Cook
Cook 5-6 hours on low

DIY Wednesday: Sweaters from Mittens

To follow up on my last DIY Wednesday project of the Blessing Bags, I present these upcycled mittens

Photo Credit: Nikki in Stitches

I originally saw this project on Martha Stewart, and I LOVE it. I have issues throwing anything useful away, but there are just some things (like that ugly Christmas Sweater, or the sweater that your husband shrunk) that I know won't sell in a secondhand store. 

This is the perfect project. They're definitely cute enough to wear yourself, but  I love taking a Sunday afternoon and cranking out 20 pairs to take down to the local homeless shelter or soup kitchen, or to put in my blessing bags.

It's truly the easiest project in the world.


Step 1: Trace your hand in a mitten pattern like this (I use a 1/2 inch seam allowance)

Step 2: Cut two layers of fabric from this pattern.
Step 3: sew together

Step 4: turn inside out so the sewn edge is on the inside
Step 5: Repeat to make a matching mitten

Once you get the hang of it, I've found it takes me roughly 5 minutes a mitten. I can crank out a dozen while watching a movie on a lazy afternoon.